monotony

I am having one of those days. For some reason, I feel tired and sad at the same time. I wish every day could be a great fun adventure because then I would never feel bored. We are in California with beautiful weather, and yet I am not happy. I feel like my days are exactly the same, just in a new location. It is a daily struggle with me. I know other people feel the same way, and yet I feel alone in this. I don't know how to fix it either. People say, "Just wait until your kids are in school. You will be so busy!" I am one of those people who ENJOYS busy. I have days where I just want to get out of the house to see other adults. I am lonely. It is a complex situation.

hard to believe

This past Wednesday, a high school classmate of mine lost his 14 day old daughter. Sudden and tragic death always makes me realize how precious every day is. That night as I put my children to bed, I hugged them a little tighter and longer than normal. Why God has blessed me with 2 healthy children I do not know. But I know this: There is not a moment in our lives that is not controlled by God. He holds us in His hands through the good and bad. And just when we think we cannot make it through, He gently nudges us and shows us just enough hope to keep going. And really, that is all He asks of us. Life is hard, but God is good.

Over

Christmas is finally over. We took down our tree today which made the house feel much roomier. Thank goodness. Bennett discovered that taking down the tree is not as much fun as putting it up. LOL.

Only 3 weeks until we leave for California. I am excited and yet somehow feel sad that we won't see family for awhile then. The weather will make up for it I guess. And we will be so happy to see everyone when we get home!

I am praying for some warmer weather soon. Kurt has to work outside in the cold all day. I know he gets frustrated. So here's hoping for global warming.